Gawk

Ok..no real time..kids upstairs with dh...

How did I get so FAT?? Yikes!! Just checked myself out in the mirror with just a pair of knickers on......sob........I cannot see through my tears.....what happened?

So...had a grand time with my slutty friends...they polished off loads of wine (I was deemed the designated driver) and were discussing the most scandalous topics at dinner time (having to do with bjs) I was weeping in despair...I wanted to talk about scrapbooking and doilies....sigh...

We did play nicky nicky nine door and ate 5 FULL meals per day.....hmmm...maybe midnight salami sandwich feasts contributed to my fat ass??? hmmmm

Now we are doing 'family things' for this week-both dh and I have the week off....I've noticed that MOST (93%) married fathers have really fat bellies.....most of them are really ugly and yucky........am having to stare at the guys running the tea cup ride to see something decent....sigh....

Ok...so I do NOT have a date with a gorilla.....sigh...I just learned how to pick and eat bugs out of heads.......now what???

Oh..one more thing...it's really true..most women are really crappy drivers...like they are lost in a fog...driving so fucking SLOW and not realizing they are in the wrong lane until the last second and then veering off without any warning! If I were Queen I would not allow women drivers (except me of course-I am phenomenal...) This holds true for most women drivers but 100% of women mini van drivers-they are all really shit! All of them. I hate mini vans. I am usually a very nice driver and allow cars to bud in front of me when their lane ends or whatever...but if they are driving a mini van I don't let them in....I am prejudice.....