Is there anything better than a spring fair? The noise, the lights the junk food…..there is something for everyone at a town’s fair.
I’ve always loved fairs and carnivals…was hoping to become a carnie at one point in my life…..travelling around the country…hollering at little kids…..having a cigarette dangling from my lips and pushing that big red button on ‘The Zipper’..flirting with the guy who runs the ‘toss a coin on the plate game’ (it’s fixed). What a life!
But since my career aspirations were never realized I have placated myself by attending every carnival/fair/bunch of rides in a strip mall parking lot extravaganza.
When I was a young girl we had a spring fair in my town called, ‘The Spring Fair’. It was as exciting as its name!
All the cool kids hopped the fence to avoid the 75 cents admission fee. I was never cool nor ‘sporty’ enough to do that. So I had to fork over the dough. Once inside we were surrounded with rides that were sure to cause nausea for 72 hours, and deep fried everything, and even a building that housed both pigs AND pies.
In our younger years we played the flip over the rubber duckie to win a prize (I never won anything) eating waffle cones and scrounging all our money together to go on a few spine tingling rides.
As we grew older we went just to walk around and look cool. We wore our tight Jordache jeans…red striped tube tops….ate grape popsicles and looked for cute guys. After a day of wandering around wiggling our bums it was nice to finally settle in at one of the girl's homes for sour cream and onion chips and orange pop.
We would talk about the carnie with the missing teeth who winked at us…the fat moms banging into our heels with their strollers (why do so many women do this?? Why??) and the cheap kids hanging around at the bottom of The Zipper to grab any loose change that fell out of the riders' pockets.
We also had a winter carnival called ‘The Winter Carnival’. This one was more spectacular because it had SNOW PRINCESSES. The princesses were girls from the 4 local high schools. Each grade had selected their ‘snow princess’ and on Friday night (the ultimate in cool nights for a winter carnival) one lucky contestant would be crowned
And what honour was bestowed upon this lucky princess? She received a real fur coat from the local furrier (I had a HUGE crush on the nephew of the furrier) she also had the use of a CAR for the year, and got to sit beside Santa Claus during our ‘Santa Claus Parade’. What girl did not dream of becoming a Snow Queen?
Even as a young child…freezing my toes off and drinking watery hot chocolate that burned my tongue I knew I would never be a snow princess-let alone the Queen. To me they were like movie stars. All smiley and thin with their Farrah Fawcett flips. Their purple eyeshadow and a light spray of freckles across the bridge of their noses. They were the cream of the crop, the chosen few. I had a major crush on all of them.
On Saturday we would go back and drink more watery hot chocolate..skate on the pond, look for snow princesses, look for cute guys from our class and commence the bum wiggling..and eat burgers. The highlight of the carnival was a sky diver who jumped out of an airplane and landed in a big red circle in the centre of the pond. Many years he ended up dangling from a tree…
Years later as a full grown adult I stumbled across our 'Spring Fair' . I dragged my friend to join me in all the merriment. We gorged on corn dogs and pop and sticky caramel popcorn...on burgers and candy floss and beaver tails...yum..then went on a few spinning rides. I barfed more that evening than I had in YEARS! And it was not grown up barf (usually booze) but kid barf (too much candy). So, even at 27 years old I was STILL barfing from eating too much candy...sigh...
Sadly, the ‘Spring Fair’ has been scrapped. But they still have ‘The Winter Carnival’ not sure if snow princesses are invited….but I’ll bet they still serve that watery hot chocolate….
I’ve always loved fairs and carnivals…was hoping to become a carnie at one point in my life…..travelling around the country…hollering at little kids…..having a cigarette dangling from my lips and pushing that big red button on ‘The Zipper’..flirting with the guy who runs the ‘toss a coin on the plate game’ (it’s fixed). What a life!
But since my career aspirations were never realized I have placated myself by attending every carnival/fair/bunch of rides in a strip mall parking lot extravaganza.
When I was a young girl we had a spring fair in my town called, ‘The Spring Fair’. It was as exciting as its name!
All the cool kids hopped the fence to avoid the 75 cents admission fee. I was never cool nor ‘sporty’ enough to do that. So I had to fork over the dough. Once inside we were surrounded with rides that were sure to cause nausea for 72 hours, and deep fried everything, and even a building that housed both pigs AND pies.
In our younger years we played the flip over the rubber duckie to win a prize (I never won anything) eating waffle cones and scrounging all our money together to go on a few spine tingling rides.
As we grew older we went just to walk around and look cool. We wore our tight Jordache jeans…red striped tube tops….ate grape popsicles and looked for cute guys. After a day of wandering around wiggling our bums it was nice to finally settle in at one of the girl's homes for sour cream and onion chips and orange pop.
We would talk about the carnie with the missing teeth who winked at us…the fat moms banging into our heels with their strollers (why do so many women do this?? Why??) and the cheap kids hanging around at the bottom of The Zipper to grab any loose change that fell out of the riders' pockets.
We also had a winter carnival called ‘The Winter Carnival’. This one was more spectacular because it had SNOW PRINCESSES. The princesses were girls from the 4 local high schools. Each grade had selected their ‘snow princess’ and on Friday night (the ultimate in cool nights for a winter carnival) one lucky contestant would be crowned
The Snow Queen
And what honour was bestowed upon this lucky princess? She received a real fur coat from the local furrier (I had a HUGE crush on the nephew of the furrier) she also had the use of a CAR for the year, and got to sit beside Santa Claus during our ‘Santa Claus Parade’. What girl did not dream of becoming a Snow Queen?
Even as a young child…freezing my toes off and drinking watery hot chocolate that burned my tongue I knew I would never be a snow princess-let alone the Queen. To me they were like movie stars. All smiley and thin with their Farrah Fawcett flips. Their purple eyeshadow and a light spray of freckles across the bridge of their noses. They were the cream of the crop, the chosen few. I had a major crush on all of them.
On Saturday we would go back and drink more watery hot chocolate..skate on the pond, look for snow princesses, look for cute guys from our class and commence the bum wiggling..and eat burgers. The highlight of the carnival was a sky diver who jumped out of an airplane and landed in a big red circle in the centre of the pond. Many years he ended up dangling from a tree…
Years later as a full grown adult I stumbled across our 'Spring Fair' . I dragged my friend to join me in all the merriment. We gorged on corn dogs and pop and sticky caramel popcorn...on burgers and candy floss and beaver tails...yum..then went on a few spinning rides. I barfed more that evening than I had in YEARS! And it was not grown up barf (usually booze) but kid barf (too much candy). So, even at 27 years old I was STILL barfing from eating too much candy...sigh...
Sadly, the ‘Spring Fair’ has been scrapped. But they still have ‘The Winter Carnival’ not sure if snow princesses are invited….but I’ll bet they still serve that watery hot chocolate….
2 comments:
Hey, I finally noticed your blog addy under your SL posts. Thot I would visit. Love your blog! I also just love a woman that likes to give unsolicited advice, rofl!!!
Hi Angela,
I left a comment about your rant on our heroic firefighters and quietly heroic Business Analysts....
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